[printable PDF of Have You Found Your Soul-mate?][audio MP3 of Have You Found Your Soul-mate?]

     Good morning and welcome once again to the Berean Break.  My name is George A. Sinkie and I am so glad that you have joined us this morning.  I hope that our time together this morning is profitable for you and I know it will be if you do a couple of things.  
     First, we have to enter all study of the Bible with an open mind and heart, or we will never grow spiritually.
     Second, we need to open our Bibles and check out what is taught.  Is it the truth?  Does it harmonize with the Word?  By far the majority of the religious teaching in the world today does not teach truth about God or His will.  So we need to check it out.  As we begin this morning, let’s go to God in prayer:

Great God in heaven, we thank You for this day.  We thank You for the Springtime and the growth taking place.  We thank You for the moisture we have received and pray for the continued blessing of rain.  Lord, just as we see the growth around us, may we too grow in Your will.  We come to You now in the authority of Jesus, AMEN!!

     Recently a number of people that I know have announced that they are in a relationship or that they have gotten engaged.  While these are great events in people’s lives, I need to know more before I can rejoice with them.  Even if you are already in a relationship or are married, this is an important lesson to se if God’s will is being followed.  This lesson is mainly looking at entering into a marriage, but even in regard to those we “enter into relationships” with, we want to be pleasing to God.
     Marriage is the second oldest relationship known to man.  The oldest is man’s relationship with God Himself.  In Genesis 2, we see God creating the Garden of Eden for Adam to live in, providing food for Adam, and giving him work to do.  God did not want Adam to be alone and so they looked for a suitable helper.  Note Genesis 2:18-20, ‘Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.”’  And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name.  And the man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him.”
     When no suitable helper was found among the animals, God created woman, this is recorded in Genesis 2:21-22, “So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh at that place.  And the LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man.”  By this we see that God’s design for marriage in a relationship between one man and one woman.

     We also need to understand that God’s design is for this man and woman who are marrying to enter into a covenant.
God speaks of this in Malachi 2:14, “Yet you say, ‘For what reason?’  Because the LORD has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant.”
     This is what we are going to call a covenant marriage.  When we follow God’s plan for marriage, it results in a marriage that God joins together, and no one should separate it, as Jesus says in Matthew 19:6, “Consequently they are no longer two, but one flesh.  What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”

     But we also need to understand that not every marriage that people enter into is a covenant marriage.  Some, like the marriage that Herod and Herodius had, are not acceptable to God, Matthew writes of this in Matthew 14:3-4, “For when Herod had John arrested, he bound him, and put him in prison on account of Herodias, the wife of his brother Philip.  For John had been saying to him, ‘It is not lawful for you to have her.’”
     Marriages like these marriages we are going to call adulterous marriages.  The vast majority of marriages actually fall into this later category.

     First, let’s consider a couple of things that do NOT make a marriage a covenant marriage.
     Number one: The one preforming the marriage (priest, preacher, justice of the peace, etc.) said it was before God and that God was joining them together.  Just because man says something doesn’t make it true, it has to be in harmony with God’s will.
     Number two: The two people are madly in love, they believe they have found their soul-mate.  This goes right along with the “I feel it is right in my heart” mentality.  That warm fuzzy feeling is no indication the marriage is acceptable to God.

     Next, let’s consider the question, “who can enter into a covenant marriage?”  Since God designed marriage, He also gives rules and regulations governing it.  We need to look at ALL of God’s teaching and obey it in order to have a covenant marriage, which is the only kind of marriage that God joins together.  ALL other marriages are a sin in God’s sight, they are NOT joined by God, and must be separated or ended because they are sin.  According to the Word of God there are only three conditions that a person can be in and enter into a Covenant marriage.
     Condition one: A person who has never been in a Covenant marriage God would allow to enter a Covenant marriage.   Basically this would refer to someone who has never been married before.  But there could be the situation where they have never been married, then they marry a spouse who is not able to enter a covenant marriage (divorced for a cause other than adultery by their spouse, see condition three below).  Since this spouse could not enter a covenant marriage, this marriage resulted in an adulterous marriage that should be ended.  When this marriage ends both parties go to the condition they were in before the marriage.  The one who had never been married before still has never been in a covenant marriage.  The one divorced before for a cause other than adultery still cannot enter a covenant marriage.  I suppose, because of the times we live in, it should be mentioned that homosexual “marriages” can NEVER be covenant marriages.  They are not really adulterous marriages either.  They are simple fornicating relationships.  They are sin and should be stopped, and the person is in the same condition as they were before these relationships.
     Condition two: Someone who has been married before, in a covenant marriage, and their spouse has died.  Paul relates this in Romans 7:1-3.  Note especially verse 3, “So then if, while her husband is living, she is joined to another man, she shall be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from the law, so that she is not an adulteress, though she is joined to another man.”
     Condition three: Someone who has been married before, in a covenant marriage and their spouse was unfaithful to them and violated the covenant, while they remained faithful.  In such a case where there is a divorce, the faithful party can remarry in a covenant marriage.  The unfaithful party can never enter another covenant marriage, any marriage they enter into would be a sinful, adulterous marriage.  Matthew records Jesus speaking of this in Matthew 19:1-10.   Here we need to note especially verse 9, where Jesus says, “And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”  This is also spoken about by Jesus in Matthew 5:31-32, note verse 32, “but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the cause of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”

     There are also three other conditions a person may be in, but these conditions do NOT allow a person to enter into a covenant marriage.
     Condition four: In this condition, the person was in a covenant marriage, and their spouse leaves them.  Paul speaks of this in 1 Corinthians 7:10-11, “But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband (but if she does leave, let her remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not send his wife away.”  Some may call this the abandonment exception, but note that Paul give two options — remain unmarried OR be reconciled.  Just because their spouse leaves does NOT allow a person to enter another covenant marriage.
     Condition five: A person was in a covenant marriage, and neither they nor their spouse were unfaithful, and they got a divorce.  Neither party would be able to enter another covenant marriage.  (They could reconcile and reestablish their original covenant marriage.)  These would be marriages ended because the couple just don’t love each other any more, they have irreconcilable differences, alcoholism, abuse, etc.  Jesus speaks of these in Matthew 5:31-32 and Matthew 19:1-10, as we looked at before, they are not a part of the exception that Jesus gives and so any subsequent marriage would be committing adultery, or as we are calling it, an adulterous marriage.  In this condition the person could NOT enter into a covenant marriage.
     And finally, condition six, this is the guilty party in the situation we looked at in condition three.  Jesus again presents this in Matthew 5:31-32 and Matthew 19:1-10.  They were in a covenant marriage but committed adultery, thereby violating that covenant.  If a divorce follows this breaking of the covenant (it doesn’t have to, but if it does), then the violator of the covenant CANNOT enter into another covenant marriage.

     So, who can enter a covenant marriage?  ONLY people are in one of the first three conditions can enter into covenant marriages.  Both the man and the woman have to be in one of the first three conditions.  If one or both of the individuals are in conditions four, five, or six, then no covenant marriage can result.
     Being a soul-mate (or helpmeet or suitable helper) is not a matter of feeling or emotion, it is a matter of submission to God’s will and a complete commitment to the covenant that marriage is intended to be.

     This Berean Break is brought to you, in love, by the pre-denominational and non-denominational church of Christ that meets at 1600 East First Ave. in Mitchell SD.  You are welcome to meet with us at 10:00 Sunday Mornings for our assembly followed by a time of Bible Study, also on Wednesday evenings at 6:30 for an additional time to study God's Word.  If you have a comment or a sincere Bible question, please phone us at 605-770-5555.
     We want to remind you of the non-denominational TV program, "KNOW YOUR BIBLE" on KDLT-TV at 9:00 on Sunday mornings.  This is George A. Sinkie for the Lord's church, here in Mitchell, good-bye for now.  Remember that we care about you and may God bless you as you do His will.

[printable PDF of Have You Found Your Soul-mate?][audio MP3 of Have You Found Your Soul-mate?]